Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Don't "Just Get Out and Vote"

As I was driving to vote I started to think about the people who will be voting today.  After I stopped crying  I wondered if I even wanted them to go vote to begin with. There are so many people that have no idea what or who they are voting on. They just show up and cast a vote because people tell them to “just get out and vote.” I say NOOOO! Don’t just “get out and vote!” If you fail to follow any of the rules below… don’t vote.

There needs to be a test on the topics at hand before people are allowed vote.
Voting Rule #1: If you vote for the guy with the biggest and most signs, you should not vote. As I drove by the hundreds of election signs that are posted on every street corner on my way to vote today I began to wonder the purpose of these signs. The experts who are in charge of putting the signs up believe that the more signs you see the more likely you are to vote for that person. The unfortunate thing is that for many people, this works. “I’m voting for Bill because he had the most signs on the side of the road on my way to work.” “What policies does he support?” “I don’t know, but he had lots of signs… and they were red white and blue so he MUST be a patriot.”  If you are this imbecile, do not vote.

Voting Rule #2: If you vote because someone told you to go vote, you should not vote. I see a lot of commercials on television and on the radio telling people to "just get out and vote." This especially happens on young people media channels like MTV and others that appeal to the 18 to twenty somethings. The way I look at it is if someone has to ask or remind or otherwise motivate you to go out and vote, then most likely you have no idea what is going on and should, therefore, not be voting.

I think the picture says it all...
Voting Rule #3: If you do not understand that men and women have died to give us the right to vote, you should not vote. Remember that this is a privilege to vote and there are millions and millions of people on this planet that do not have that privilege. It isn’t a duty to vote it is a privilege. Don’t think of it as a job that you have to go out and vote. You get a chance today for your voice to be heard. Now after saying that... just because you have the chance to vote doesn't mean you should if you are uneducated on the candidates.

Don't let shiny objects distract you.
Voting Rule #4: If you listen to the television and radio ads put out by the pundits and take them as truth, you should not vote. 99% of all the information in those ads are so badly skewed that there is barely any remnant of truth left. I’m not even sure the names are correct. There is a large possibility that the man on the television may in fact be a monkey that had his face shaved.  Just assume that all "facts" regarding the candidates are completely false when listening to those ads and you should be safe.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large numbers.
So, if you are someone that falls into any of these categories (and I’m sure there are more I’m missing) please do not go out and vote today. Please do not listen to those “just get out and vote” ads and signs. If you “just get out and vote” we will have a mass number of uneducated morons at the polls today electing God knows who because of God knows what.

You do not want to be this guy two years down the road.
Besides, if you do not go out and vote then my vote will mean that much more.


  1. Ha! Amen.
    Hubs and I had a discussion about this a couple days ago. If you don't know the issues, find out before you vote...if I hear one more person say they voted for someone because of ONE ISSUE, regardless what it is (gay marriage, saving baby seals, free licorice at the gas station, whatever) I'm going to shoot them. What about all the other things that person is going to permanently screw up??
    Also, I believe that if you don't pay taxes you don't vote. You shouldn't have a say. Especially regarding things like, oh..., TAXES!

    I don't need for you to agree with my politics. I just need you to be informed about for what you are voting!

  2. I take it back.
    You should agree with my politics.
    'Cause I'm right.

  3. Generally speaking, it is better to vote issues than candidates. To quote Charles Bukowski "choosing one candidate over the other is like being given the choice between eating hot shit and cold shit